Repelled by Dust of Mustard
If you’ve ever felt watched while fishing, or heard laughter from beneath the pond dock, you may have stumbled into the reach of a Bell Bottom. And if so, we hope you brought mustard.
| Height: | Variable (emerges from water bell-shaped) |
| Temperament: | Malicious, hungry, theatrical |
| Delights: | Mud, baited hooks, secrets told near water, trembling footsteps on docks |
| Detests: | Dust of Mustard, sunlight on reeds, direct eye contact, iron buckets |
| Botanical Weakness: | Dust of Mustard |
Bell Bottoms are grotesque cryptids that lurk beneath bogs, lake shallows, and abandoned irrigation trenches. Ancient bestiaries depict them as part trap, part tormentor—a living decoy with a body shaped like a bell and a face that mimics whimpering prey. Medieval fisherfolk claimed they rang like distant bells when hungry, luring travelers to shorelines under moonlight.
Many oral traditions describe Bell Bottoms as once-human: cruel marsh priests, failed bait merchants, or jealous pond spirits who transformed themselves into predators of the foolish. They dangle fish bones from branches and croak out sounds that mimic lost children, deer, or desperate dogs.
Bell Bottoms live submerged, only surfacing when food or fear is near. They anchor themselves in reeds, mud, and submerged furniture—bathtubs, boat hulls, broken wells. They loathe detection, preferring to lure victims close by imitating harmless sounds or twitching false bait near the water’s edge. Once close, they rise slowly, drawing victims into their hollow midsection with the suction of pond rot and flattery.
| Behavior | Likelihood | Notes |
| Mimicking cries for help | ★★★★★ | Common near dusk, especially in remote wetlands. |
| Dangling bait or jewelry from sticks | ★★★★☆ | Often old fish bones or wedding rings. |
| Ringing underwater at dawn | ★★★☆☆ | Can only be heard when alone. |
Hint: If the water reflects what isn’t there, and the reeds are too still, you are being studied.
Most visible when half-submerged, Bell Bottoms resemble overturned bells or rotted barrels with twitching appendages. Their mouths gape upward, revealing spiraled teeth and a tongue that splits into barbs. Some wear discarded hats or veils, seemingly collected from past victims. They are unnaturally still—until they aren’t.
A deep bubbling, like a clogged pipe. A creak like a drawbridge. But most often, the voice of someone you know, just faintly wrong. Their mouths do not move with the sound. Do not speak back.
Wet rust, spoiled fish, and algae thick with breath. The scent may linger on docks or on the wind before storms. If your food starts tasting like lakewater while still dry—leave.
Ingredients: Dust of Mustard, a dead twig, and a black stone
Method:
Outcome: Disrupts Bell Bottom interest in your camp or home for three nights. Works best during waning moons.
| Metric | Score |
| Global Population | ★★☆☆☆ |
| Human Encounters | ★★★☆☆ |
| Conservation Status | Uncommon, hiding near active water lines and old settlements |
Dust of Mustard is the surest defense against the tricks of Bell Bottoms. Our blend is finely ground, sealed in wax, and ready to cast the bitter burn they fear most. Carry it by docks, sprinkle it near campfires, and never fish alone again.
